BY KEVIN SAWYER – Deciding to get married and have a life together, that involves two instead of one, is a huge decision that can never be taken lightly. Will it work out in the long term? Well, perhaps we should venture out and see what the latest relationship research says?
- A University of North Carolina study has found that if you wait until you are at least 23 years old, your chances of ending up divorced is only 30% compared to marrying younger. The other important matter is the matter of chemical imbalance. Your body surges with certain hormones at the beginning of a relationship that brings about that “in love” euphoria. The chemicals will surge for about 100 days before getting back in balance so you really aren’t able to tell about being “in love” for at least that long. Most research says you will likely know after a year.
- A recent government study found that actually being friends before taking the leap will drastically increase the success and longevity of a marriage. Being one another’s BFF really does, indeed, help. Another recent study found what seems to be obvious but isn’t always. The closer you are in age to one another, the greater the chance of success. You will have far more in common especially childhood memories and experiences.
- Several different research studies found that if a couple gets really fired up over the success of their partner, they are likely to stay together. Being happy for a partner’s good news is great for one another’s emotional well being. There is a sense of trust established. A sense of having one another’s backs.
- One doesn’t really need a research study to know how resentment can grow over time if one partner believes they are carrying too much of the load. Sharing all that is your life together, especially household chores, is critical to keeping resentment from forming and exploding down the road.
- If you have decided to move in together “to see how it goes” then you do not really have any confidence in the relationship and you should just forget it. Also, if one partner depends on the other financially, the dependent one is far more likely to be unfaithful. A UConn study found something interesting, though. It found that women who were the breadwinners almost never cheated while the men that were the breadwinners were almost always likely to cheat on their partner.
- And, speaking of sex, according to a Carnegie Mellon study, the quality of your physical life is far more important to the individuals in the relationship than is quantity. It is that connection, that sharing, that true intimacy, that is most important.
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